Friday, April 15, 2005

Perfect - a word of illusion?

There comes a time when all you think about is the perfectness of life that you are in now. Everything seems to be perfect: a perfect score, a perfect family, a perfect living, and even a perfect boyfriend. However, when you are emphasizing on the word 'pefect' many many times, it turns out that this word is just illusional.

I doubt that each moment of my life is what i see as perfect. I don't see life as being perfect, but i see it as a momentary perfection. For those who are reading this entry of mine, you might be thinking where i'm heading to... well, to keep you from questioning on further, i'm heading to one point - perfection is just an illusion. I enjoy every moment of my life now as i have a wonderful boyfriend by the name of Zeck. He is committed and loving and i just love him more and more each day by knowing the fact that he is who he is in my life.

Reality strikes when you never wanted it to. A friend of mine is going through a hard time as she, at once, had someone she could be committed to and to be loved. When she got into my car today, i was almost close to tears when she told me that it had all ended the night before. How can one so committed and so loving deserve a break up like this? Somehow i couldn't make sense out of it. It may be a nightmare for her, but in a way, it influence much on my thinking.

I sat there, in silence, just thinking... I can't help it but to think of me being in her position, which of course, i wouldn't want to. However, i could never help it. I tried to cry, but i know that i have no reason to do so.

~Life must go on even though things happened the way you don't want it to~

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