What exactly is freedom? A friend of mine once told me that there is no such thing of freedom on earth. Well, what he said was pretty much sensible. Just think of being in a world with nothing to choose from; no decisions to make in the life you are living in; and no need for food and drink… now that’s what freedom is all about which is, do no choice at all. Think about it, one can never have freedom as they have no choice but to breath to live the next second of his/her life.
I feel like a fly trapped in an empty container, hoping to find a way out of this enclosed space. I don’t know when I could find an opening to fly away from this misery. All I know is that if I were to find an opening, the distance that I can fly to may not be far before I get locked up once again.
Ironic isn’t it when life knows no freedom. No freedom of choice and no freedom of speech. What you need to know is guarded, what you need to follow is always stated there in the book of rules and regulations. Whichever corner you turn to, a barrier will be there to prevent you from knowing what’s going to happen at the other side. All you know is that by the time you are granted freedom is on the day of your death itself. Well, not as certain yet of course as by then, you’ll be on your journey to either heaven or hell… *tee-hee* (of course, if these two places exist in your vocabulary, then you wouldn’t have the freedom to choose which place you will go to as God will be the judge).
I’ve been through times of perturb these days and I wouldn’t want to blame it on anybody. I wish that sometimes people could just keep a distance in the difficulties that I am facing. It is good to care, but it is entirely wrong to interfere when one does not need help in hoping to make their own decisions. Sometimes in life, even as a teenager, we need to have the given space and time to make our own decisions; mistakes and learn to mend it. I don’t see why, being a 20 year old, everything and every move made must be well thought and well taught by parents and others around me. Why can’t I be given the opportunity to learn from my own mistakes and hopefully to mature in the process? I don’t see how others’ supervision is going to take me to places but to only have me become cowardice to take my own risk in life. Advice may help once in a while, but again, the consequences that need to be encountered will be up to the person to live it through.
Think about it, a teenager afraid to drive on the road just because his or her parents think that their daughter or son will be next to contribute to the statistics of road accidents.
I wish I was given the chance to work wherever I want; travel around the globe alone on a plane; go backpacking across the country; prove to myself that I am capable of any risk and that I can learn from the mistakes I make. Am I still that young? Aren’t 20 the age of pure maturity? Isn’t it the age of risk taking and also the age of learning how to live independently on earth? It is true that a child should always be interdependent to parents, but, a child needs to grow out from his or her diapers and into the world of reality.
My mind is full of thoughts right now and I find it hard to put my troubles to rest. I guess I’ll just close my eyes and count to 10 till I doze off to sleep. All I know is that I would not want to be a fly which is caught in a container to await for my own death to make me part from the earth.
6 comments:
hi sweetie! just passing by... and gonna drop some comment.. age is just a number.... we can be as old as forty year old aunty and think like a kiddo.we can be just 17 and think or act like a 30-sumthin'. bear in mind... parents will always treat us like babies. it's up to us to show them 'when maturity hits us' and prove it so.. that their lil girl is a full grown woman and then they'll treat us as one and be damn proud of her. no hurt in trying! indulge life, freedom or no freedom... good luck babe!
freedom is the will to choose with the options laid before you. I quote a famous saying: all things are permisable but not all are beneficial.
you can do everything you want to do, but be prepared to bare the consequences ;)
God bless you,
Bro
are you planning to convert into a muslim if you do end up marrying your bf in the future?
jon... do i know you? it doesn't mean that i marry a muslim i want to convert to the religion :P
you dont remember me....?
but we're in malaysia. you have to convert into a muslim if you do marry one wont you?
i'm only 20... marriage is not in my mind.
i don't remember you. Care to refresh my memory?
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