Secrets... life's stressful

I came to know the fact that the most interesting thing in life is a secret or a story untold. And once told, everyone's a victim to a certain thought. A secret keeps someone away from a smile; a secret keeps someone away from the truth; and sadly, secret keeps someone away from a long lasting friendship. One may quarrel over petty issues or concerns, but one can never tolerate an unfold secret.

Secret, as defined in the dictionary, not known or seen; not meant to be known or seen. Everyone keeps a little part of themselves from the world, but how long can that little secret be kept away from society; away from a friend; away from a loved one; or even away from oneself. A secret being revolved around the unconcious mind of another just makes them suspicious to the people around them. However, life without a secret makes a person perfect. One may argue that it does. To me, a secret is what keeps a person striving for survival. As long as it is unknown to the world, days pass by like just any other.

Just today that i've only find out the deepest darkest secret in me which has been within me for the longest time. I'm not talking about my superego trying to over take my body, but more to my mind's trying to have me concentrate on something much more important than what i am doing in my life right now. As much as i would like to share, but i guess it is only a matter of months in order for me to finally come face to face with my biggest hidden secret. The fear of life and a life that i fear most might come true.

Well... i wouldn't want to make my post a bore. I guess the reason for my not updating my blog is that i've lost interest in posting up a new post every now and then. Or should i say, i've run out of interesting things to say. Well, i would love to write an update of my life in Australia but i don't think it is necessary for the time being as everyone knows i'm well and that i'll only be here for a year. Well, sadly, i did not get the chance to go to the commonwealth games as i do not have the money to get tickets. When i did have the money, the tickets were all sold out. Am i unlucky or what? I'll definately be going for the AFL, NRL, and also one of the stand up comedies. I've been trying to search for a job here, but seems to me like they aren't very keen in hiring international students.

Alright, need to get back to my research. I need to get things done but i do not have the motivation to do so and i don't have the inspiration that i have back home to do things. Argh!